You’re not Beyonce

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Beyonce has the same amount of hours in the day as you! You’ve probably heard this saying before and if you haven’t, you probably will. It’s usually said in a ‘power to you’ tone in a well-intentioned pep talk and if you say it to yourself or to others, you need to stop it right now. Yes, Beyonce has the same 24 hours as you but it’s likely she also has a nanny, chauffeur, stylist and all-round assistant. So this article is for those of you, guys and girls, who adopt a superman/woman mentality to approach your day.

Why people say it

When you’re struggling to keep balls juggling in the air, whether it be studying, relationships, work, wellbeing or any number of demands life asks of us, it’s very tempting to let them drop. With constant connectivity with the net, the need for networking to land jobs on today’s topsy-turvy career ladder, and all the normal demands life gives us, it can feel like you just don’t have what it takes to carry on managing. Especially when social media gives a picture perfect vision of everyone else succeeding. And that’s why you tell yourself, and allow others to tell you, that you can handle everything life throws at you and come out shining on top.

Why it’s harmful

But that’s not how being human works. We don’t have an endless source of energy, inspiration and knowledge that we can just keep borrowing from. Sometimes, more often than not for most of us, that source is dry right at the moment when we need it. So when your best friend pumps you up by telling you to channel your inner Beyonce but you don’t manage to create world peace in a day, you feel like a failure. Why can’t you jump out of bed at 6am, chug down a raw kale smoothie, hit the gym, complete projects before noon, hit the gym again, hit the town, maintain all your relationships and not have a hair out of place at all times – right? Wrong.

more to life

What to think instead

My lightbulb moments usually come when I’m in my pyjamas and binging on Netflix. When I come home, whether it’s been a rough day or a motivating one, I almost always allow myself to throw everything out the window – as an idiom, of course, although it’s tempting to do it for real sometimes. This isn’t because I want to shut off the world but because this is how I reset my buttons. Naturally it’s not so easy as I make it sound, particularly being a big fan of to do lists and not being able to cross everything off mildly infuriates me. So when this happens, there are two questions I ask myself and you should try this too the next time you feel you’re not accomplishing enough:

What will happen if I don’t do this thing? The key here is to focus on one thing at a time and really vision the worst that could happen. Go all out. If the consequence of it being left undone today really is dire, then do it. If it can wait, let it wait and stop feeling guilty about it.

What activity makes me forget about the outside world for a moment? Now that you’ve found something you don’t absolutely positively have to do today, it’s time to allow yourself to switch off. Whether it be five minutes or until the morning after, you need to reset your buttons. You won’t be able to accomplish anything if you burn yourself out.

We’d love to hear your stories on how you wind down and handle stress. Let us know in the comments!

Tiffany is the creator of Incubate Magazine. When she is not writing for Incubate or freelance gigs, she gets cosy with a book, wishes for an ugly dog and pines for the countryside. She has a Bachelor degree in Journalism and is currently studying a Bachelor in Business.

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